We just got back from spending the weekend in Moab with my mom and dad.
Here are the boys on our first hike in Canyonlands.
It was fun.
The boys loved it!
The weather even cooperated with us (I even got a little sunburn on my face:)
Here are the boys on our first hike in Canyonlands.
It was fun.The boys loved it!
The weather even cooperated with us (I even got a little sunburn on my face:)
But it was also really hard.
I thought it might be a little tough going there without him.
But it was really, really hard.
When we were getting close to town I saw the parking lot to a jeep trail that we'd gone on the last time we were there and I lost it. (Luckily the boys were engrossed in a movie so they didn't wonder what the heck was wrong with me.)
The boys all yelled out "There's Hotel 6, that's where we stayed last time with dad" when we passed Motel 6. It was fun to hear them talk about the memories of Moab they have with their dad. And I'm glad there are so many.
But right now I am mad. I am trying really hard not to be. But I am.
I am mad that they didn't get to make new memories with their dad this trip. I am mad that their first trip to the top of the sand hill with their rolls and flips on the way down, and their first time hiking to delicate arch, won't be associated with their dad.
I am just mad that he's not here.
Don't get me wrong, I know that he was there with us. I know that he got to see his boys do all these amazing things for the first time. But right now I just want him here. With me.
I just want to be able to hold his hand while we follow the boys on hikes. I just want to hear him tell me to 'relax and just let them be boys'. I want him to take us for a jeep ride. I miss our jeep rides.
I miss everything about him...
I know that I am so blessed.
And that I have so much more in my life than so many others. But sometimes it is just hard to not be mad. But even through the madness (I know right:) I know my Heavenly Father is there for me. I know he loves me so much! I know that as hard as this trial seems to me there are people out there going through worse things.
I am so blessed to have the gospel in my life. I am so grateful for the knowledge I have of the plan of salvation and that I can be with Clint for eternity! I am so grateful for my Savior and the peace he brings in my life.
I heard a quote today that I love...
"Begin to be now what you will be hereafter"
So hopefully I will wake up tomorrow a little less mad so I can start working on that:) I know I'm horrible huh?!?
Goodnight All. Love ya.
and i'll try to get more moab pics soon
I thought it might be a little tough going there without him.
But it was really, really hard.
When we were getting close to town I saw the parking lot to a jeep trail that we'd gone on the last time we were there and I lost it. (Luckily the boys were engrossed in a movie so they didn't wonder what the heck was wrong with me.)
The boys all yelled out "There's Hotel 6, that's where we stayed last time with dad" when we passed Motel 6. It was fun to hear them talk about the memories of Moab they have with their dad. And I'm glad there are so many.
But right now I am mad. I am trying really hard not to be. But I am.
I am mad that they didn't get to make new memories with their dad this trip. I am mad that their first trip to the top of the sand hill with their rolls and flips on the way down, and their first time hiking to delicate arch, won't be associated with their dad.
I am just mad that he's not here.
Don't get me wrong, I know that he was there with us. I know that he got to see his boys do all these amazing things for the first time. But right now I just want him here. With me.
I just want to be able to hold his hand while we follow the boys on hikes. I just want to hear him tell me to 'relax and just let them be boys'. I want him to take us for a jeep ride. I miss our jeep rides.
I miss everything about him...
I know that I am so blessed.
And that I have so much more in my life than so many others. But sometimes it is just hard to not be mad. But even through the madness (I know right:) I know my Heavenly Father is there for me. I know he loves me so much! I know that as hard as this trial seems to me there are people out there going through worse things.
I am so blessed to have the gospel in my life. I am so grateful for the knowledge I have of the plan of salvation and that I can be with Clint for eternity! I am so grateful for my Savior and the peace he brings in my life.
I heard a quote today that I love...
"Begin to be now what you will be hereafter"
So hopefully I will wake up tomorrow a little less mad so I can start working on that:) I know I'm horrible huh?!?
Goodnight All. Love ya.
and i'll try to get more moab pics soon
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4 comments:
Totally understand the anger, and the falling apart. Been doing that myself recently. You are an inspiration! Enjoy the puppy (which I think you are crazy to get but I'm not an inside dog person and probably not a good outside dog person either).
Amy, you are justified in your anger. It's all part of the healing process, so quite frankly I'd be worried if you weren't angry at some point. :) I love you too much. I wish I could help in some way, but I will continue to pray for you and your sweet boys. You are such an inspiration. I hug my hubbs and boys a little tighter each day because of you. All my tightest hugs to you tonight. xxoo too.
First of all you have every right to be mad I know I would be, and you are not horrible for it at all. I am sure some days it will be easier to be less mad than other days. I am so glad you got to go to Moab and that picture of your boys is so cute. I have been to Moab once and it was beautiful I will never forget it. I want to see some more pictures :) You are strong and so amazing I feel blessed to know you.
I've been getting mad too, so I totally get it. I'm glad you had a nice trip to Moab. You are doing great!
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